SCBC Urbana 06

When I first applied for Urbana, I did not have much of a purpose for going other than going for the sake of going and seeing what it would be like. By the time Urbana departure date rolled around, I realized that by going to Urbana, I wanted to renew my love for God. During my first semester at university, I did not lead the Christ-like life I had led that previous summer. My flame for the Holy Spirit was diminishing. I was hoping that Urbana would remind me of the love that I once had for Jesus. Also, the first semester of university made me unsure of the future that lay ahead of me, more so than before. Seeing as the theme for Urbana ’06 was “The Calling”, I was hoping that perhaps I’d be able to figure out my future there.

Urbana, at first, seemed a little overwhelming; so many seminars to choose from, so many people around you. But knowing that all those people around you had the same purpose for life, it was comforting. The people, the seminars and the general meetings with fantastic worship, helped me realize why I became a Christian in the first place; it was God’s love that was shown to me in November 2005 that I became devoted to loving Him.

Although my flame was growing, my doubt and insecurities for the future remained. I attended a seminar that helped me realize that my career choice didn’t matter, as long as it made God proud. God will guide me in the direction He wants me to go; He will provide me with all that I will need. But I must also look at myself, determine what my spiritual and natural gifts are, what I enjoy, and what others might think I’m good at. The future was not something to fear, but embrace.

I also happened to attend a prayer ministry/seminar regarding sexual brokenness and healing. There I had realized how I have not figured out how to forgive myself for things that occurred in the past. I knew God had forgiven me through Jesus, but I hadn’t let things go and continued to dwell on the past. I must learn to continue asking for the ability to forgive myself and others, and with time, I will. I must not give up nor lose faith if it doesn’t occur suddenly, for it can take a while.

Overall, Urbana gave rise to many life-changing events: I was able to recapture my love for God, learn to put more faith in Him for the future, and begin once again to let my wounds heal. Not only that, I’ve committed myself to attend a fellowship at university and continue attending a small group. I’ve also applied for a summer internship with an orphanage in the Dominican Republic. At Urbana, not only were my goals fulfilled, but I received much more from the experience that will be useful for future purposes.

# posted by elessar @ 11:00 PM